Openly undefined
The Heart & Soul of Non-Monogamy
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Ethical non-monogamy takes on many “forms”… polyamory, swinging, open marriage and everything in between. The thing about going non-traditional is that it gives you liberty to create what you want. Well, as long as everyone is aware and everyone is consenting. My husband and I classify as swingers, or in “the lifestyle.” We’ve met swingers who do swing, but don’t ‘identify’ with that term. We’ve met polyamorous couples who swing, and those who don’t. Actually, I have found that most open-relationship folks don’t really like to define themselves…it’s that whole non-traditional thing. The one thing we all have in common is being “open” to one degree or another. Open can be ridiculous amounts of fun. Open can be obscene amounts of sexiness. Open can also be complex. This is a blog about all of it.
If you find yourself unfamiliar with some of the terminology (common at first), here’s a Glossary of Terms to help.
The Sex Drive Mismatch: Why ENM Can Make It More Obvious, Not Less
Sex drive mismatches are incredibly common in long-term relationships, monogamous or non. But when couples step into ethical non-monogamy or the swinging lifestyle hoping to solve that mismatch, they often discover something surprising (and sometimes painful): the mismatch becomes even more obvious. After seven years in the lifestyle, twenty-plus in my marriage, and coaching couples full-time, I see the same three mismatch patterns show up again and again.